


like a fly will never love you

by lastwingedthing



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2017-08-19
Packaged: 2018-12-17 08:11:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,372
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11847510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lastwingedthing/pseuds/lastwingedthing
Summary: Mai hates the Earth Kingdom.





	like a fly will never love you

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ConvenientAlias](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ConvenientAlias/gifts).



Perfectly still and perfectly quiet, Mai watched the court proceedings from her seat at the back of the family dais. In the dim red room, the defendant’s green robes seemed to fade to a dull brownish colour. His face was slowly bleaching white.

He’d been found guilty – _was_ guilty, she supposed. Desecration of the image of the Fire Lord was as bad as desecration of the Fire Lord himself, everyone knew that. _(Everyone in the Fire Nation knew that - )_ Her father, so newly appointed to the position of Governor, could hardly let that kind of disrespect stand.

She didn’t know why her father was still _talking_ , though. The man had already been found guilty, news of his punishment would quickly spread through this dreadful provincial little city, and it was unlikely that anyone else would get caught doing anything so stupid. No informant would pass word back to the Fire Nation that her father was tolerating unpatriotic behaviour, thus damaging his chances of getting a better position back home in a year or two. Problem solved. Couldn't they all just hurry up and move on?

_(The defendant's face was so pale, couldn't they just let him go back to his cell to feel sorry for himself in peace...?)_

Mai hoped they’d finish soon. If she was really lucky, the Fire Court would end for the day before she was due to meet with her etiquette teacher for the day's lesson, and she’d be able to stay in this room and listen as the captains of the guard briefed her father on their search for old regime loyalists and insurgents. They hadn’t found anything yet, but in a stone city full of Earthbenders that meant less than nothing, not when hundreds could hide themselves inside the walls of the city itself. Mai was a little surprised that her father was bothering to run the full court at all, when the city hadn’t yet been fully secured.

Of course even if she managed to catch the guard’s briefing, she wasn’t likely to be entertained. Listening to the guard and her parents misunderstand each other would be boring too; it was only the slight reminder that they were all risking death here that would enliven her afternoon at all.

But her father was _still_ lecturing the prisoner about his duty of patriotism towards the Fire Lord –

He’d drop dead of boredom before the guard had a chance to execute him, at this rate.

 

 

Mai hated the Earth Kingdom, and she was quite sure that her family had been sent to the worst city in it. She hated everything about Omashu: the dust, the bleak mountain scenery, the dry cold air that cracked her lips and flaked away the skin on her hands. The food was bland and uninteresting, endless textureless vegetables and bean pastes with only a shred of meat here and there to remind Mai of what real food tasted like. She missed spicy Fire Nation flamepods seasoning every meal, and seafood, and _real fruit_ -

And none of that was as bad as dealing with her parents, sometimes. At formal dinner with the officers last night, after the eel-hound shipment of mangopeaches they’d all been waiting for had arrived shrivelled and half-rotten, her mother had tried to cheer her up by telling Mai that it would only be a year or two before they got their own mangopeach plantations up and running, so they could enjoy fresh fruit at any time, just like at home.

Mai had stared at her from under her hair; around the table, everyone with the barest grasp of geography or climate, the difference between tropical seacoasts and a cold mountain plateau, stifled snorts of laughter.

“Sounds delightful, Mother,” she drawled, not bothering to keep her tone polite. It wasn’t worth coming up with anything else to say, or even imagining what she might have said to someone else, a long time ago, at the Academy when she still had friends.

There wasn’t any point anymore.   

 

 

At dinner that night, Mai’s parents talked together in low voices, leaning in close. She caught them glancing at each other, glancing in the direction of Tom-Tom’s room. _(Always their first thought, isn’t it…)_

She wasn’t the only one who’d missed the guard’s briefing; the court session had run so late her father had cancelled it altogether. But maybe one of the guard had made time to talk to her parents before dinner, and there'd be news… subtly, she angled her body closer.

“…it’s the disrespect, of course. They’re only peasants, but why can’t they _understand_ their duty is to their lord? If they hear about this incident at the capital…”

“They disrespect us because they hate us,” Mai interrupted, not bothering to lower her voice. “We conquered their city, took over their king’s palace, even took their city's name - why are you surprised they aren't rushing to worship the Fire Lord?”

Her father stiffened all over in outrage.

“Mai! Keep your voice down, you don’t understand the political situation here! They’re only Earth Kingdom peasants, they’ll soon be grateful for the benefits we’re bringing to the city.”

He didn’t seem to realise that his hissed whisper was far more noticeable than ordinary conversation.

Mai clenched her jaw.

“I understand that if you don’t do something about the security situation here, what the capital thinks of you will be the least of your worries. How can you both be so blind? How can you refuse to see what's right in front of you? You're just _sitting_ here, thinking everything is fine...”

“ _Mai!_ ”

Her mother leaned in and gripped her forearm, fingernails digging in hard.

“Will you _be quiet!_ Think about the danger you’re putting all of us in. Putting _Tom-Tom_ in…”

_I don't care about Tom-Tom,_ Mai thought fiercely, before she could stop herself. _You both care about him more than you care about me..._

Smoothly, Mai flexed and twisted her own arm to shake her mother’s hand free.

__

“This dinner is boring,” she remarked, to the table in general. “I’m going for a walk.”

__

Her family didn’t let her go alone, though. They never did.

__

 

__

 

__

Mai didn't sleep well that night, tossing restless and frustrated on the hard cold Earth Kingdom bed. By morning she was so tired she could barely see straight.

__

When the Fire Nation palanquin arrived, for a long moment Mai thought she was dreaming. She couldn’t believe Azula was really in it, at first. Not here, not in the worst damn city in the Earth Kingdom – why would anyone who had any choice come here? It had been almost a year since Mai had seen her; it didn’t seem real.

__

But it was really her, really, truly - 

__

Mai found herself smiling for the first time in a year.

__

Azula was older now, a little taller. Her hair had grown out again, after she’d hacked it short in a fit of temper in their second year at the Academy. _(She was still so beautiful - )_

__

It was so good to see her. Ty Lee, too; there was a new confidence in the way she carried herself, in the way she smiled. That bubbly happiness was more like the Ty Lee Mai remembered from their childhood, not the increasingly withdrawn, unhappy girl she’d been in the last year at the Academy.

__

Turned out the circus had been good for her after all. Who would have thought?

__

Mai didn't care so much about her parents, not when her friends were here. But even so, Mai made sure to ask Ty Lee questions about the circus while she was still in earshot of her mother, in her most carrying voice, to see how well she could make the older woman squirm.

__

 

__

 

__

Azula agreed that the lack of attention on security in Omashu was appalling.

__

Azula agreed that something needed to be done.

__

Azula thought Mai was capable of doing it –

__

Mai had almost forgotten what it felt like, to have someone believe her, believe in her. Even when she – they – failed at their first task, letting the Avatar and his friends escape, Azula still wanted her for the mission. And Azula never accepted anything but the best.

__

When they left, the three of them together, Mai didn’t look back.

__

 

__

 

__

The transport tank was cramped and bad-smelling – the aroma of eel-hound did not improve in close quarters – but just this once, Mai didn’t care that she was spending hours crammed into a tiny room between the stable and the engine.

__

It was like being back at the Academy, in a way, those days when the three of them had been desperate for privacy, cramming themselves into the strangest places in the cellars or the armoury or the crawlspace under the roof where no-one else would find them. Once the three of them were alone together they fell back in old habits fast, the way they talked to each other, the way they fell in sync practicing their fighting skills or braiding each other's hair. Just like it had been at the Academy.

__

Except there were no teachers, now. No lessons. No other students, alternately sycophantic towards the Fire Lord’s only daughter and bullying and cruel towards the freaks who refused to behave like everyone else.  No-one to hear what they said.

__

No-one to see what they did.

__

 

__

 

__

Ty Lee had very obviously had practice since Mai had been with her last, but Azula kissed just the same. Hot and demanding, pushing into Mai’s space before she was ready – but sometimes, just sometimes, she would forget herself and relax, sinking into it, letting Mai lead. Ty Lee was gentle, playful – even more of a tease than she used to be - but somehow never entirely surrendering herself. Even when Mai or Azula had her squirming and desperate, begging...

__

It was good. It was so good, with either of them, with both of them. Sometimes Mai thought what she liked best of all was sitting back and watching Azula and Ty Lee together, the way they touched each other, the way they moaned - but it didn't really matter what exactly they were doing, as long as she was with them.

__

There wasn’t really room to do much, here, but it was enough – more than enough.

__

And the days stretched out, uncomfortable sometimes, dangerous, even boring, but Azula was there, and Ty Lee, and the boredom never lasted that long.

__

_Don’t make me go back_ , she thought to herself sometimes desperately, _please, please don’t make me go back_.

__

_I can’t leave them. I can’t ever leave this_.

__

_I don't want to, I_ can't  _go back._

__

 

__

 

__

Azula got angry, sometimes. Mai didn't mind that so much, but Ty Lee did; and Mai  _did_ mind it when Azula made Ty Lee upset. 

__

Mai could usually talk Azula down, but not always. She tried to tell Ty Lee not to flinch, not to show fear, because that just made it worse - if you didn't give Azula anything she'd lose interest, Mai had learnt that years ago - but Ty Lee wouldn't, or couldn't, take Mai's advice. 

__

It wasn't that bad -  _she wasn't as bad as she'd been the year they lost Zuko, she wasn't_ \- and Mai knew how to handle it, when Azula did get upset. 

__

And anyway it was better than Omashu, Mai told herself, anything was better than that. 

__

 

__

 

__

Ba Sing Se wasn't Mai's favourite city either, but it wasn't that bad. The climate was almost civilised, for one thing - although Mai definitely didn't plan to stick around to find out what winter would be like - and the food was tolerable. 

__

The Kyoshi warrior outfits were  _not_ really tolerable, but Mai wouldn't have to wear hers for much longer, and wearing some ugly clothes for a few days wasn't the worst thing Azula had ever asked her to do. Mai saved up her refusals for when they really mattered. 

__

Despite the colour scheme in the Earth King's palace, which was certainly affecting Mai's emotions for the worse, Azula was in one of her good moods, pleased with herself and her plotting, lazy smile tilting up the corner of her mouth. Mai wanted to kiss it - couldn't, here, didn't, but she wanted to. 

__

From the way Azula was smirking she could tell what Mai was thinking. 

__

"It won't be long now," she said to Mai, voice husky and purring. "We'll get what we want."

__

She could have been talking about kissing or about the fall of Ba Sing Se; it was always hard to tell, with Azula. 

__

"I can't wait," Mai said dryly. 

__

That wasn't quite true, though. She liked anticipation - or rather she liked the surprised pleasure that came when she got something she wanted after all, after she'd convinced herself that she wouldn't get it and it didn't matter anyway. 

__

Mai was used to preparing herself for disappointment, but it was hard to do that right now. Succeed or fail, they were unlikely to be in the Earth Kingdom much longer, but was too difficult to even imagine what life would be like - good or bad - after they all returned to the Fire Nation. 

__

Would she be able to keep spending all her time with Azula and Ty Lee, the way they had been for weeks?

__

Would they recall her family from Omashu?

__

Would  _Zuko_ be there - that last sent a strange twist to her stomach; she pushed the thought away. 

__

Would Azula still get angry - no, that was another thought to ignore. 

__

She would be fine, Mai told herself, uneasy, refusing to listen to the little voice in the back of her head that was taunting her. Once they were back in the Fire Nation Azula would be better, and Ty Lee, and all of them would be happy together. It wouldn't be like it was before.

__

_(Only - only she wasn't sure - )_

__

It didn't matter. Mai didn't have to think, didn't want to. She had her friends, she didn't need to think about anything else.

__

 

__

 

__

"I have a present for you, Mai." Azula's voice, low and teasing in the warm, hazy afternoon. "Hold out your hands."

__

It was a perfectly ripe mangopeach, glowing like a little sun in her hands. 

__

They shared it, together. 

__

The juice tasted so sweet. 

__

**Author's Note:**

> Tagged for mild, non-explicit underage, just in case.


End file.
